My first entry into the proposed TOO BAD ITS FKIN COOL! series talked about DEEP RISING (1998) and stated that my follow up post would be about the highly undervalued and very loathed AVP REQUIEM (2007). I say proposed, because its taken almost 2 years to actually sit down and do this follow up post.
Side note: Coming into adult hood I noticed I had a reputation for saying I was going to do something and never doing it. At the time I didn’t know “ADHD” or “Autism” existed or that I could have either of them. It all makes sense now in hindsight. At the time I hated this character trait and this passionate response to “NOT BE THAT GUY” has stayed with me all my life. SO… it may take me 2 years or longer BUT I will always do what I said I was going to do, or fail, or die trying.
But you can thank ROGUE ONE (2016) for me getting here!
Here´s a little in-sight into how my mind works;
- I really wanna re-watch ROUGUE ONE.
- When you take away nostalgia and the 1st act, RETRUN OF THE JEDI (1983) is a very hard watch and only serves as a forewarning for the up-coming shitty prequel films George Lucas will be adding to the series.
- I need to post my opinion because everyone needs to know about it!
- But wait… I have to do my post about AVPR first!
So here we are…
Aliens Vs Predator Requiem, aka, AVPR, aka, AVP Requiem. (2007) – AND WHY THIS FILM STANDS UP AS A KIKASS THROW BACK TO CLASSIC SCI-FI/HORROR FILM-MAKING!
Widely considered the worst film in both franchises, with reviews that described it as “a disaster”, “unwatchable” and a “shameful abuse of the iconic monsters”. Despite the scathing reviews the film was a minor financial success, grossing 130.3 million from a 40 million budget which suggests I am not the only person who thinks the film is a retro-throwback rollercoaster ride of fun! I will address all the major criticism the film received and why these are the very things that make the film so great!
The film was attacked “mostly” for being too dark! Not in tone or mood, but literally too dark to be able to see anything. The fact that it felt like I was watching the film on VHS was an instant bonner for me! I have never been a fan of Blue-Ray. I can respect the technical advancement but for me film is an art form and as such crisp vibrant clear visuals is not an improvement to every type of film especially the Sci-Fi or Horror genre. Blue-Ray editions are only good for basic bitches, people with horrendous eye sight and the added extras.
(Have you seen the porn films I produce?)
As a Sci-Fi series that leans into the Horror genre (referring to the Alien franchise) SEEING LESS ALWAYS ALLOWS FOR GREATER SCARES! I remember showing my X the original A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) via a streaming platform and straight away regretting not showing him it on VHS instead. He commented on how it hadn’t stood up to the test of time and even I was cringing at how embarrassing it looked. Which really frustrated me cause IT DOES stand up to the test of time! Our imagination will always be more scarier than what we are shown. Suspense is always more intense when you are waiting for something to jump out of the dark. It´s what made us all shit-scared watching these films growing up in the 80s!
The decision to make it so dark also added to the fantastic retro-feel the film has. When I was watching it I felt myself reminiscing on classics like, The Blob (1988) remake and MIMIC (1997). AVPR captures the essence of these old films perfectly.
…which leads straight into the next thing that it was slagged off for that only continues creating the retro vibe. Shitty characters! The Randomness of the script with characters that die as fast as they are introduced or never appear on screen again. Have you seen NIGHT OF THE CREEPS (1986), or nearly any slasher film form the early 80s. It was attacked for the lack of likeable characters but what ever happened to liking the characters you just wanted to fuck? In this case for me it was, Johnny Lewis (RIP). First they said all the characters were stupid then complained that the stupid characters were killed off too quick, like the (SPOILER!) sudden death of the love interest of the aforementioned Johnny Lewis, played by Kristen Hager. Was anyone remotely concerned for any of the main cast of STRANGER THINGS during the final battle? No, because we know the creators of anything remotely commercial these days wouldn’t dare kill off any major characters. If no one in a horror film is in jeopardy (and its not purely focussing on gore-porn) then there is no horror element to the film. Killing main characters off is needed to create jeopardy and suspense.
…which leads straight into the next thing that it was slagged off for and that is the fact that it was turned into a “Slasher flick”. To which I really have no intelligent response other than, “And…?”
Then they went on about the R rating and gratuitous gore. I am all for gore if its cumulative of the films vision or type of film it is trying to be. HOSTEL (2005). Any TEXAS CHAINSAW film (I chose to use the trailer to my favourite NEXT GENERATION (1994) . I feel it only added to AVPR´s high octane feel second by the films pacing and editing that would have Michael Bay nodding in approval.
Then they attacked it for fucking with the Alien “lore” and timing between incubating and bursting out and then the aliens growth spurt. Funny enough no one slagged of ALIEN ROMULUS (2024) for doing the same thing. Though they did provide a chrysalis to distract from the convenient growth spurt to help film pacing. And I guess they also missed the fact that the first AVP (2004) had already thrown all the previous mythology out the door!
Some nerd with a YouTube channel complained the Aliens were treated as background extras compared to the focus the Predators got and the only treason I even mentioned it is because of how stupid that statement is.
So there we have it. All the reasons AVPR was slaughtered and all the same reasons I love it! Feel free to comment on this post and tell me what you thought? Or to start a conversation about any of the films mentioned in this post.
For me its always been about the Alien franchise. And I rate them in this order.
- Aliens
- Alien
- Alien Romulus
- Alien Resserecution
- Alien 3
- AVP & AVPR
Like Star Wars Ep. 1-3, I try my best to pretend Prometheus and Covenant never happened.
