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End Game.

By January 23, 2020No Comments

I don’t remember being this affected by a TV show since the Wonder Years. I think I literally have teared up every episode for the last 5 episodes. I love Otis (have been an Asa fan since Ender’s Game) and I love Adam, and goddamit if he doesn’t remind me of Skip. (A much more innocent version.) It’s really been pulling on my emotional strings…

I have had 2 people very close to me die unexpectedly, this has made me afraid that people will not be there again after the last time we have spoken. I’ve also been hurt badly by someone I really loved. Someone I tried to see the good in, and fought for, no matter who I hurt in the process and no matter how many people told me I was wasting my time only to be left with almost 5 years of lies, which has made it very hard for me to have faith in what anyone tells me. Words now are just a manipulative tool for people to use on you to achieve their own agender. “That was a joke.” or “I didn’t mean that.” Well, why say it in the first place. Nothings just a joke, even a joke comes from a place of laughter, fear, hurt or viciousness.

Bruiser told me I’m unaffectionate. I was surprised but then when I think about it, it makes sense. I was bound to build walls up to protect myself. One’s I might not even know are there. Bruiser makes me happy, he makes me smile and he is the first guy who doesn’t make me feel ashamed of my sex addiction. I wasn’t looking for a new boyfriend, I had spent 5 years trying to make the one I had work. Then I even fell in love with another guy who hurt me for similar reasons. So I wasn’t looking for anything.

Then a beautiful muscle pitbull bounced into my life and we were just taking one day as it comes, living in the now. But the sex was out of this world and his loyalty and honesty had a purity to it that I haven’t experienced before.  And suddenly I wanted him to be there tomorrow and I wanted to believe the things he was telling me. The only thing I know for sure is time always reveals the truth. Maybe this time it reveals something awesome. Full of rough piggy sex, big roided muscles, safety, cuddles and…

Well, let’s see…

Comment and Like if this made you HARD

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